Wednesday, July 20, 2011

My thoughts are all jumbled in my head and I'm so good at getting myself down. I need to take control of some things, but I don't wanna. I'm stalling I realise, but I don't care. Just because I know I'm doing something, doesn't mean I can stop it. I don't think before I speak. I keep shouting at people my parents. Its...weird. I'm really really lonely.
Going to a Rise Against concert tomorrow. Gonna be awesome... hopefully. Listen to their new single Make It Stop (September Children). Yes that's an order. The lead singer was inspired to write it after seven (was it seven? I don't want to go on Wikipedia to check) LGBT teenagers committed suicide in September last year. I heard it a couple of times last night - yay Youtube - but this morning I played it in the car and I was close to crying by the end. Dunno why it was then but whatever. In fact, I'll embed it here. If I can...

Looks like it worked. Dad's being irritating. DAD GO AWAY. Urgh. I snapped at him. I just don't fucking care sometimes.


There's a party on Friday night. Could be fun, but I can't find the tux I was going to wear. It's my brother's second hand one - mum's probably done something with it the bitch God I want to scream sometimes.

So anyway. I haven't talked about music for a while huh? Rise Against of course, but check out Nero's songs "Promises" "Guilt" "Me and You" and "Innocence". Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO - no doubt you've heard it already - as well as "Champagne Showers" and "Shots"
Slam by Pendulum and Camo & Krooked's remix of "Monster" by Professor Green. Very awesome.
Wow April? That's how long since I did a New Music list? Wow. There's Rammstein, Pendulum, Nightwish, Bliss n Eso, After Forever, shitloads of stuff. None of which I'm going to do tonight. Besides, if I dump it all on you at once, any minute chance you'd actually check it out would probably disappear.

I'd get a job, but i can't be bothered. I'd start a new blog, but I can't be bothered. I'd try in school, but I can't be bothered. I'd quit school, but I can't be bothered. I'd go outside, but I can't be bothered. I'd do a lot of things, but I can't be bothered. And let's face it, you can't be bothered reading this. I want.. a lot of things. who cares.

Why the hell does anyone ever get up in the morning? Why bother? Why keep trying? Why? Why? WHY?

I am a copy of a copy of a copy. a clone. Nothing. I am not a beautiful and unique snowflake. I am the same decaying organic matter as everything else. My ideas are plagarism. My life has been done before. My problems are old ones. My tragedies are boring and repetitive. There was only so much originality in the world and now it is gone. I was born original. I will die a copy. I do not. Fucking. Care.


Camelgirl said...


Erimentha said...

i like fight club. i like your writing. i hate parents. i hate being unmotivated.